The Real Reason(s) Didier Ndong will not Start Again this Season

Didier Ndong missed out again against Watford, this time because he is too small and wouldn't help us defend the set pieces which ultimately cost us the game. That and his lack of Britishness has kept our record signing benched so we thought it would be a good idea to consider Dave's reasons for not starting Ndong our remaining fixtures.

v Leicester
"I was thinking of Didier, he definitely had a chance. I thought that this game needed less 'Nd' I mean, you have to respect the officials here. Having Ndidi and Ndong on the pitch would make things very difficult for him because the names are so similar. You have to respect the officials and help them."

v Man United

"I thought I might play Didier, but we needed that Manchesterness in midfield. Gibbo spent a lot of time down there and it's where we signed Jack and Denayer from too. They understand what it means to live in Manchester and I felt like they would give us the advantage given that we are playing them in Sunderland."

v West Ham

"You have to look at the bigger picture, so I couldn't start Didier. When you look at West Ham, there's not a lot of hair there in the middle and I think Didier would stand out too much. He'd be too easy to mark because of his hair. I had no choice but to match West Ham in their lack of hair so I thought Seb, Gibbo and Jack would give us the best chance of a win."

v Arsenal
"Didier has been unlucky recently but I have to make the difficult decisions and it was the right one to leave Didier out today. We were talking about favourite crisp varieties and he told me he loved a packet of Worcester sauce. I thought that was too outrageous and that wouldn't be great against a midfield we have to be ready salted against. We lost but it was the right decision."

v Middlesbrough
"It's a real shame we have been relegated today but I don't think leaving Didier out had anything to do with it. I had to leave him out because on Friday he and Gibbo had a game of rock, paper scissors to decide who would play and the lad just wouldn't stop changing his mind. He won 8-3 in a best of 15 and I just felt like he was too unpredictable. Gibbo stayed loyal to the scissors and I really liked that."

v Bournemouth
"Didier was in contention, definitely. It's a matter of value though, isn't it? I mean, Bournemouth have only spent a wee bit of money on their midfield and we needed to match that. Seb, Gibbo and Denayer barely cost us a penny in transfer fees so I thought it was a good match up."

v Hull
"I chatted with Didier last night about his favourite animal and he didn't say tiger so I had to leave him out. If I start players who are afraid of tigers against the Tigers I'm giving us big problems. He told me he wasn't afraid of them but I felt like he was just covering his tracks."

v Swansea
"I had a feeling Didier would start today, but I changed my mind. I know that Didier isn't from this country and he really struggled when we played pin the tail on the Donkey - Brexit edition. He pinned Wales closer to Cornwall and I just thought that displayed real ignorance on his part. You have to understand the opposition and although there were no Welsh players playing for Swansea and we are playing in Sunderland I just didn't feel Didier understood what we were up against."

v Chelsea
"Didier came to my office the other day to ask to play this game and I really considered it. However, I couldn't. Didier hasn't played enough football recently so in the end I had no choice.

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